If coming here was an illness...

[Mmmmmm]

...what would it be called and what would its symptoms be?

Suppose the authors of the new DSM-V (diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders) are considering including frequent visits and contributions to this site as signs of a psychological disorder (and hey, let's not rule that out).

What would it be called?
What would the indications be that one was inflicted with this illness?
What would the treatment modalities be?

For instance:

Mozsolo Personality Disorder:

Diagnostic criteria
- Frequent need to be insulted, derided or belittled
- Irrational jealousy against people named Julia
- Compulsive need to download every note Morrissey has ever sung
- Obsessive thoughts about what colour socks Morrissey wears
- Defensive and apologetic about bad songs and verbal faux pas

Treatment
- MPD is an Axis II disorder and cannot be cured. It's symptoms may be alleviated some by group therapy (a.k.a Morrissey Smiths Nights with other fans); verbally flaying anyone who suggests he's gay; and holding out hope that the Smiths will reform for a one-nighter even though you profess revulsion at the very idea.

 

[imogen11]

...what would it be called and what would its symptoms be?

Suppose the authors of the new DSM-V (diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders) are considering including frequent visits and contributions to this site as signs of a psychological disorder (and hey, let's not rule that out).
What would it be called?
What would the indications be that one was inflicted with this illness?
What would the treatment modalities be?

For instance:

Mozsolo Personality Disorder:

Diagnostic criteria
- Frequent need to be insulted, derided or belittled
- Irrational jealousy against people named Julia
- Compulsive need to download every note Morrissey has ever sung
- Obsessive thoughts about what colour socks Morrissey wears
- Defensive and apologetic about bad songs and verbal faux pas

Treatment
- MPD is an Axis II disorder and cannot be cured. It's symptoms may be alleviated some by group therapy (a.k.a Morrissey Smiths Nights with other fans); verbally flaying anyone who suggests he's gay; and holding out hope that the Smiths will reform for a one-nighter even though you profess revulsion at the very idea.

haha, brilliant!

hmmm..diagnostic criteria.... how about:

Obssessive compulsive need to instigate or participate in hypothetical discussions about Smiths reformations. For example, a sufferer may participate in an existing thread addressing a possible reformation one week and then instigate an additional thread the following week (see also Selective Amnesia). Said sufferer does not tire of this repetitive discussion. Appears unresponsive to repeated attempts by moderators to redirect them to similar threads.

 

[westendgirl]

Well I don't about coming on here, but about being obssessive towards Moz, my mom says I have Morrisseyitus. I couldn't agree more.

 

[nugz]

Mmmmmmm, that was brilliant! you should post more often!

 

[girlunafraid]

wouldn't some people have frinkinitus?

 

[snapyou]

Oh,i read it as "If coming was an illness..."

 

[HIM]

...what would it be called and what would its symptoms be?

Suppose the authors of the new DSM-V (diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders) are considering including frequent visits and contributions to this site as signs of a psychological disorder (and hey, let's not rule that out).

What would it be called?
What would the indications be that one was inflicted with this illness?
What would the treatment modalities be?

For instance:

Mozsolo Personality Disorder:

Diagnostic criteria
- Frequent need to be insulted, derided or belittled
- Irrational jealousy against people named Julia
- Compulsive need to download every note Morrissey has ever sung
- Obsessive thoughts about what colour socks Morrissey wears
- Defensive and apologetic about bad songs and verbal faux pas

Treatment
- MPD is an Axis II disorder and cannot be cured. It's symptoms may be alleviated some by group therapy (a.k.a Morrissey Smiths Nights with other fans); verbally flaying anyone who suggests he's gay; and holding out hope that the Smiths will reform for a one-nighter even though you profess revulsion at the very idea.

i like this thread. it raises interesting questions about what illness 'is'.