Clubs & bars...

Mozzy1

New Member
What's the significant part of these?

Do you think it's possible to meet "the one you're meant to be with the rest of your life at one"?

Have you ever just wanted to walk-out of one b/c the place was a total dive or in a rough area?

Have you ever had to wait in line to get into one only to be denied b/c you weren't "cool/trendy/attractive" enough?
 

Zelda Zonk

New Member
Since I work on my own, I've met virtually every single one of my dates in a bar or club. It's been pointed out to me that this is probably not such a good idea since there is always alcohol involved.

As far as leaving somewhere because I didn't like it - yes, of course. Plenty of times. Sometimes you walk in and it's just 'NO'.

My favourite places are dingy little clubs, basement bars, and traditional pubs.
 

oye terence

ampersand after ampersand
why must thought or questions be put into everything?
i go to bars to have a drink or two and have a laugh with friends, when i am feeling social.its pretty simple.if i am single and go out and meet someone then so be it, if not i am not that troubled as i am still out for my original intention, have a drink and some laughs with my friends.
 

iamkali62

New Member
No offense, but you are making this quest about finding the ONE very hard for yourself. (You know how I feel about your situation.) Meeting people of the opposite sex in a bar or club and expecting anything more than maybe a date or a nice chat is setting themselves up for failure. Go into a club or bar with some friends- have some drinks, just have FUN. People can sense desperation on someone and think, "What's wrong with this woman/man?" Go out with your friends and colleagues and just have a fun time out. MAYBE you'll meet a great person - maybe not, but if someone sees you laughing and having a good time, you'll have a better chance of meeting someone. Like Moz says, "Let them come to you....just like I do, just like I do..."
 

bored

Lust a prima vista
Terrence has the right idea. You should never go anywhere with some specific outcome in mind other than things that you are completely in control of.

"I'm going to go out, have a few drinks and talk to some people."

Maybe I'll like them.
Maybe I'll want to know them better.
Maybe I'll dislike them.
Maybe they will like me.
Maybe they will dislike me.

It doesn't matter. The second you make it matter you start saying that these people have more value than you do. Once you start behaving like other people have higher value than you it's pretty much game over.
 
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I go clubs/bars for these reasons; have a good time, good music, spending time with friends and to get shit faced :rolleyes: If I meet someone that takes my fancy in the process then so be it, that's a bonus. If I don't, it doesn't bother me. Setting out with the mentality of meeting someone special is a recipe for failure.
 

bored

Lust a prima vista
Have you ever had to wait in line to get into one only to be denied b/c you weren't "cool/trendy/attractive" enough?

My friend owns a club.
There is a dress code.
If you are not within the guidelines of the dress code you are not going to get in unless you know someone.

Most people are pissed that they can't wear sneakers or hats but there are still problems with just bad style.

It is unlikely that club will not let you in for your looks unless they basically only let models in. In Vegas where 80% of the women are attractive, even women of below average looks can get into clubs. They just might have to pay a cover charge.

Style gets you a long way in trendy places.
 

Mr Smith

is partially blind
I'd like to go to one of those single bars and sit at the bar. I can talk to the bartender all night, whilst flicking the complimentary peanuts to potential prey in a seductive, and highly sexually charged manner. One day.
 

Wozzer

New Member
I often made that mistake while enjoying a night out and hoped that maybe tonight I might meet someone special. Then I go to a bar and basicly do nothing that would help my (very innocent) intentions to meet someone. I can be very childhis sometimes. :o Wait for the stranger come to you and this NEVER happens in a bar. Not in uptight-Finland anyway.

Well, I'm little smarter now and mainly focus on the drinking part.. That's the purpose of the barculture anyway, I think.
 

Jane Birkin

Member
What's the significant part of these?

Do you think it's possible to meet "the one you're meant to be with the rest of your life at one"?

Have you ever just wanted to walk-out of one b/c the place was a total dive or in a rough area?

Have you ever had to wait in line to get into one only to be denied b/c you weren't "cool/trendy/attractive" enough?

There's no such thing as THE ONE, we are born alone and we will die alone and everything in between is just what you want to make of it, it's up to you if you want to make sense of the chaos, I guess it helps.
 
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Mozzy1

New Member
I went to this club in NYC. It was a very small & seedy-type of one in relation to the "bad" area it was in. The moment I walked in, I just had that God-given gift of intuition that, I knew I wasn't meant to be there. I felt very weird & self-conscious.

Everything there was very, very modernistic & trendy whereas in my personal life, I'm such the opposite. I mean, if you people seen what I have decorated around my apartment with, you'd understand. I'm a very shy/reserved/quiet/country-like/cozy-like/comfort-like/bookish woman therefore, being in a totally new environment such as this artsy-modern-sophisticated format was totally out of my realm.

Yet, I gave it a chance but, even the chance I gave didn't help in my singlehood but, I still opened myself to a new environment.

It's just weird but, funny @ times how people fit in one realm but, not in another.
 

PregnantForTheLastTime

Hideous trait.
I'd like to go to one of those single bars and sit at the bar. I can talk to the bartender all night, whilst flicking the complimentary peanuts to potential prey in a seductive, and highly sexually charged manner. One day.

I have a fantasy of being picked up in a bar. Obviously it's not something I've ever done. We rarely went out to the bars in college because they were packed to the gills with soused fraternity boys and sorority girls. And later... seemed to be no reason and my "date" didn't like places like that. Now I really only go to clubs/bars to hear music.

So anyway: the bar at the Four Seasons in Chicago. I'm drinking a vodka tonic. It's very dark and intimate there. I don't think they have peanuts, though. Maybe someday.
 

Paulc

On holiday by mistake
To give it a chance to see if I'd meet someone.

but thats not the reason to go to a bar

the reasons to go to a bar include having a drink, chatting with friends, watching a band. If you happen to meet someone new there thats a bonus but it should never be the point of going in the first place.
 

mozzette

New Member
It's just weird but, funny @ times how people fit in one realm but, not in another.

I try to fit into both. I enjoy my home life- peace and quiet, books, sad little hobbies, learning etc but at the weekend, or when I feel up-for-it, I can let my hair down and go mad with the kids (how old does that make me sound :D:D).

If you want to go out, go out. This may sound really sad but a few times when I was going through a rough patch, I went out alone to the seedy little pubs in town. I found that to be the best experience as I made myself talk to random people and I learnt so much from the people 'normal' folk stay away from. I cheered up and had a great laugh...alone.
When I met my ex I wasn't looking for anyone that night and that lasted 10 years. I'm just glad I'm single now as I can do things on a whim (like talk to nutters in bars :D)

Yeah so, what was my point...erm...

Just do what ever makes you happy. I assume you wouldn't be asking if you didn't want to so...go, have fun! :guitar:
 
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