Dreaming of a Weegie Christmas

[Shaky Speares]

To the tune of "Mistletoe and Wine"

Christmas time, drunkenness and crime,
Children playing in filth and grime,
With cars on fire and trainers under tree
Time to rejoice in be-ing Weegie,
It's a time for stealing, a time for receiving,
Knock-off gear - worra great feelin'
Why pay top dollar, yer can nick it for free,
Just like our 'lecky, gas and TV..

Christmas time, piss-ups all the time
Nicking ciggies, spirits and wine
Wearing shell-suits and Nikes - all knocked-off gear
It's great getting pissed - on someone elses' beer

It's a time for drinkin',six packs of Stella
That ye got from some dodgy fella
Christmas is sound, Christmas is best
God bless our dealer - and the DHSS
Christmas time, time to joy-ride
Then go and visit family inside
With Dad on a six stretch and Sis up the duff
This "City of Culture" can get pretty rough.

So next time you're driving through Weegie-city
You may just know why the streets look so shitty
So keep a sharp eye out for those dodgy deals
If you park for two minutes, they're off with your wheels.

 

[Patrick McCann]

Ah kin get ye pairs o' longjohns. Therty boab a pair. Nae tother a ba'.

> To the tune of "Mistletoe and Wine"

> Christmas time, drunkenness and crime,
> Children playing in filth and grime,
> With cars on fire and trainers under tree
> Time to rejoice in be-ing Weegie,
> It's a time for stealing, a time for receiving,
> Knock-off gear - worra great feelin'
> Why pay top dollar, yer can nick it for free,
> Just like our 'lecky, gas and TV..

> Christmas time, piss-ups all the time
> Nicking ciggies, spirits and wine
> Wearing shell-suits and Nikes - all knocked-off gear
> It's great getting pissed - on someone elses' beer

> It's a time for drinkin',six packs of Stella
> That ye got from some dodgy fella
> Christmas is sound, Christmas is best
> God bless our dealer - and the DHSS
> Christmas time, time to joy-ride
> Then go and visit family inside
> With Dad on a six stretch and Sis up the duff
> This "City of Culture" can get pretty rough.

> So next time you're driving through Weegie-city
> You may just know why the streets look so shitty
> So keep a sharp eye out for those dodgy deals
> If you park for two minutes, they're off with your wheels.